Long has the been the time of my deliverance from the valley of the shadow of Lovell WY.
It has been spoken and prophesied that there shall be many which shall say: A letter a letter. We have written Elder Short a letter. O thou fool! knowest thou not that there is more than one week in a transfer, and that there are many transfers in a mission? My family shall write and I shall receive letters, and my friends shall write and I shall receive letters, and all this that ye may know that I Elder Short yet live.
There also shall be many who will shall say: Eat, drink, and be merry for tomorrow we shall write. And if we put off the day of our writing the missionary will beat us with a few words and it shall be well with us at the last day of his mission.
Monday there were heard many rejoicing of timbrels and of trumpets and of guitars, and all were in the habit of making merry, for it was the birthday of Elder Pimentel. And they did eat of the meat, and did drink of the Guaraná.
And on the fourth day arrived a valiant servant, who had finished his mission. And he spake: Behold! and I beheld and he began to hug his girlfriend and spake ´´this is the best part of getting off your mission´´, and we were wroth with him
And when I, Elder Short, had arrived at the chapel of our branch, we saw that we had a great lack of investigators, for they numbered zero. And the mornings and lamentations of us missionaries was great. We fell upon the ground and wept for those who had not chosen to fulfill their promises, by visiting the house of the Lord.
As I and my companion were traveling to our next appointment, we were tempted of a snakee who had wanton eyes, who made a tinkling with her feet walking and mincing as she went.
But we were blessed in the land of Itumbiara for there were many sheep that we found, that were not yet of our fold. Them too did we invite, that there might be one fold and one ward.
Love,
Elder David Short
P.S. Hopefully at least part of this made sense.
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